Engineering
AI writes the code. AI reviews the code. A third AI congratulates both on their thoughtful collaboration.
The unnecessarily intelligent cloud
AI all
the way
down.
Other clouds run your AI.
Our AI runs the company.
Infrastructure. Finance. HR. The office microwave. If a human could do it in three seconds, we can orchestrate six agents to discuss it.
Overengineer something simpleNow accepting prompts in lieu of a business plan.
“We asked whether we should use AI for everything. Unfortunately, we asked the AI.”
Fictional founding principle
Not merely AI-native. AI-overcommitted.
Every department.
One more model.
Why stop at AI infrastructure when you can make expense reports probabilistic?
All departments and scenarios below are invented. Any resemblance to your Monday is a coincidence.
Finance
Our budget is a next-token prediction. The spreadsheet has excellent confidence and a complicated relationship with arithmetic.
People ops
An agent writes the job description for the agent that will screen the agent applying to replace the recruiting agent.
Meetings
My agent meets your agent. Their agents take notes. We receive a summary of a summary and agree to circle back.
Facilities
The kettle now requires a system prompt. The office plants are waiting on their vector embeddings.
Sales
Our AI personalizes every outreach email to your unique position as a valued [FIRST_NAME].
The internal transformation engine
There must be
a harder way.
Tell us a simple office task. We'll turn it into an agentic transformation initiative with no discernible improvement in the outcome.
This is a scripted browser-only joke. No AI API, no submitted data, no actual consulting engagement.
Transformation recommendation
Your simple task deserves a complicated future.
Enter a task. We'll provide the jargon. You'll provide the coffee.
Our proprietary circular architecture
Built to close the loop.
Then open another one.
No actual infrastructure here. Just a fictional company discovering that the solution to too much AI is, apparently, more AI.
Automate the work.
Replace a two-line checklist with a planning agent, three tools, and an extremely confident paragraph.
Automate the supervision.
Deploy another agent to make sure the first agent is doing what the checklist used to do.
Automate the explanation.
Generate a board deck demonstrating that the increased complexity is actually strategic maturity.
Ask a human to restart it.
Our most dependable integration. Still powered by someone called Dave who knows which plug is which.
The allweave commitment
No process left
unnecessarily intelligent.
Even this mission statement went through a fictional committee of agents. Their only feedback was “make it more agentic.”
All decisions must be reviewed by an AI that was not invited to the meeting.